How to survive your child’s teenage years…

A teenager’s mind is somewhere best left alone. It’s not working properly anyway and it’s all confused and back to front. Everything you have ever taught your child will be forgotten, I’m hoping they store this information ready to use again once they hit their 20’s… Things like

Talking
Eating with your mouth closed
Using a knife and fork
Tying your shoelaces
Please and thank you
Forming sentences.

Only time will tell. For now all the advice I can offer is this…

Say goodbye to your cups, plates, glasses, cutlery, oven dishes, cheese grater. They will all migrate to your teenagers bedroom never to be seen again. (Do you really want them back now anyway?).
Please understand that you will never know WHAT that smell is…
Don’t feel deflated when nothing excites them, because literally nothing excites them.
Grunts and groans are a good thing, at least they’re still communicating on some level!
Food experimentation is just something they do. My son microwaves peanut butter and my brother used to put digestive biscuits in his sandwiches…
If they do happen to become enthusiastic about something don’t look interested. At the slightest hint of your approval they will immediately hate whatever it was.

Basically from what I can gather teenagers are the equivalent of a pregnant toddler that is in desperate need of a bath.

Good luck, Godspeed.

I’m sure for the next 5 years I shall come across many other ways to survive this and as I do I shall let you all know!

As camera shy as he is, I still manage to get a few now and again 🙂