Sorry, I’m busy

Sorry, I’m busy…

What does that mean to you?

If I say “I’m busy” when someone asks me if I’m free for something it can mean several different things.

I’m busy translates as ‘I have other plans’, ‘I’m out’…

• I’m working
• I’m going to the cinema
• I’m out for the day
• I’m at the gym
• I’m walking
• Going for a run
• Shopping
• Meal with friends
• Date night
• Time with my son

These are all valid ‘I’m busy’ reasons.

How about…

• I’m binge watching Netflix all day
• I’m having a bath
• I’m laying in bed all day, reading
• I’m turning the phone off, shutting the curtains, curling up and sleeping

These are all valid ‘I’m busy’ reasons. If I say ‘I’m busy’ it’s because I have already allocated my time to something else. It’s none of anyone’s business what that something else might be. Also, you shouldn’t feel guilty for not being available to someone even it happens on more than one occasion.

Any of those reasons from the second list is just as important as those from the first list, sometimes more.

Making time for yourself is the most important busy of all. So please don’t feel guilty about turning down an invitation or saying no when someone asks for a favour, even if the only reason you say no is because you’ve got plans to do nothing, that’s completely okay. Just remember you’re allowed to say no and you don’t even have to give a reason!

Can I just point out here that although it’s completely up to you how and where you spend your time and who with please be aware of distancing yourself from people who you ordinarily would spend a lot of time with.  Some of the first signs of depression are not enjoying activities that you used to and not spending time with friends anymore. If this is the case and you feel there is something underlying please speak to your GP or there are numerous helplines available. Any true friends will understand too and will always be waiting for when you’re ready to come back. Unless you’re trying to ghost them by ignoring them and always being “busy” but they just relentlessly pester you, you’ll just have to change your name and move to Yemen.

Check out the Moodzone NHS, there are loads of different helplines and websites available at different times of the day.

Here’s a list of helplines for the UK and US.

We should not let our fears hold us back from pursuing our hopes – John Fitzgerald Kennedy